Thursday, December 22, 2011

The best way to be a parent is to show them the world

This was the statement made on a late night television show last night. On a regular basis the media throws at us expectations of what a *good* parent is. What we should teach our kids, how we should treat them, and, sometimes unknowingly, this is how we set our own expectations of being a parent. The statement above made me think, I have never taken my kids to Paris, England, or Germany. We have never been as far as Florida before as a family. If we look at the statement above, I don't even make the grade on the parent scale. According to the media's viewpoint.

But, is that where I set my personal standards from?

No, I don't.

I set my expectations of being a parent on the type of parents I had. As a child, I had never been to Florida, or California. Our *big* vacations were to go to Cedar Point once a year. And, that was only for a day. In my own childhood I was blessed to have parents who provided me with things I needed. Food, shelter, enough toys to stay busy, but most important, they provided me with love. My mother also gave me the love of crafting. Probably the first craft was latch hooking. This led to cross stitching and eventually, knitting and sewing. My father gave me the love of being outdoors, of camping, and of fishing.  These are all skills I still use on a daily basis to keep my family warm, to provide decorations in the house and food for my family. Actually, this last part falls to my husband to be the provider for hunting and fishing, but I love to go with him!


If we reflect for a minute on the topic header, my parents failed. But, did they really? Children who see the
world are well traveled, probably speak more than a few languages and have plenty of pictures to show places they have been.  I have pictures of the "big one" that I caught fishing with my dad, I have a picture of my first latch hook and in the picture is my mother and I. My parents gave me the skills to be able to live the way God intended us to live,  live simply in the real world. I don't require the best or the nicest car. I just want what I need to live. Really, when you think about it, in the end, that is all we really need.

I don't know from personal experience, but I would be willing to bet in my later years, the picture of the fish is much more special to me that a picture of the biggest momument in the world. 

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Wintertime chores

Everyone has chores. Simplicity is not about sleeping the winter away - although I do think we tend to sleep more during this time- simplicity in the winter is about doing wintertime chores we do not have time for during the summer.

Currently, I have two projects going:
The first is knitting a blanket for my youngest daughter, you see, we do not purchase blankets and quilts at the store, we make them. I started making my daughter's blanket a few days ago, it should take me a few more weeks to finish. Normally, I knit at night while we are watching tv or when I am going laundry.

My second project I am currently working on is a quilt for my son's bed. I bought the fabric at JoAnn's. This takes much more time than knitting and it is a bit harder only because I have to set aside a few hours at a time to do this. But, as the old saying goes "anything worth doing is worth doing well". By the end of December I hope to have both of these projects finished up!

Walmart,, out of business??

No, I am not advocating for Walmart to close it's doors. I personally have nothing against the big chain stores, with the exception they seem to have contributed to the downfall of the mom and pop stores. They can sell things at a cheaper price, so that is where people tend to shop. Where it's cheaper.

I have a firm belief in The Lord. My personal belief is that The Lord has provided us with everything we need to survive, not Kmart, Meijer, or Walmart. Don't get me wrong, you will see my car at Walmart, I am with everyone else, they have great prices, my point is: I simply do not spend enough there to keep them in business. What do I purchase there?

Dried beans
Onions
Alfredo Sauce
Rice
Aquafina
That comes to about $30.00 per month.

This is not so much about not supporting big businesses, it's more about having the simplicity of only purchasing what we need or making what we need. We do not purchase:

Clothes
Furniture

Once a year we do a *big* shopping trip for things that we do not make that includes:

All underclothes
socks
Yarn

Our total yearly costs at department chain store comes to about $450 per year. Last time I was in walmart the person ahead of me spend around $250 and this was usual for her.

I couldn't help but wonder, I can understand a person shopping at Walmart because it's cheaper. But, how much did she purchase that she didn't need or did not intend on purchasing, but purchased it anyway because it was convenient and maybe she could find it cheaper elsewhere?

Are there items you purchase at big chain stores that you purchase because they have cheaper prices, but, actually end up spending more because you didn't do your due diligence and find out what stores really had the best prices?

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Simplicity does not = laziness

When we think about simplicity we imagine sitting on the couch with our feet up and watch marathon's of Bridezilla, Keeping up with the Kardashians, or The Biggest Loser. While I suppose you could make the time to do this, this is not what it is all about. To be honest with you, I have never even seen any of these shows. Just last week I saw what Justin Beiber looked like. You see, all these lifestyles are as far away from simplicity as you can get. They advocate for expensive weddings, beauty, money and notoriety as the norm. The bigger the better, the richer the better. I have never seen the Biggest Loser, but, i would imagine it would be a great show to watch, it advocates health and exercise, two very important aspects of life.


We are headed into winter and there is much to do. A thorough cleaning of the house from top to bottom, the bi annual unclutter that needs to be done and organizing closets. We need to get gas for the snow blower put plastic on our windows and make sure the house is as energy efficient as possible.

A thorough cleaning is not as hard as you would imagine. Most people I know have "stuff" from wall to wall in their homes. Before they clean, they have to move most things in the room. Since we believe less is better, we don't have this problem. For example, our dining room, we have a kitchen table, a footstool and a cupboard with the kids toys in it, and an antique telephone table that our phone is on. The only things in the room are things that have a functional use.

Unclutter - this is the hardest. I really owe Flylady.com for this. There was a time when i was so disorganized, I had no place to turn in my house. I would literally stand in a room and just not know where to start. It was so discouraging. I almost gave up before I ran into this site. It gave me hope I could do it, and you know, I did. This continues to be a hard part of life for me. I just keep plugging away at it. It helps that I make sure I bring nothing into my house that i don't need. I also spend 20 minutes a day organizing part of whatever room I am working on at the time.

Organizing closets. This used to be a hard time too. I avoided it at all costs. Which means, it rarely got done. I had to simplify. In the end, I rotate the coats for the weather outside. Each person in my family have 2-3 coats per person. In the closet I keep two coats for each family member. Two pairs of boots and a pair of shoes. Hats, scarves and mittens are all kept in a box on the shelf in the closet. Out of season coats go in an extra closet that has shelves for easy organizing.

Sunday, November 20, 2011

What is Thanksgiving?

It was brought to my attention that Black Friday begins on Thanksgiving night. On my local news I saw people in Florida already camped out in front of stores. As of this writing, Black Friday is still five days away. I have never participated in Black Friday and never will. It goes against the basic principles of my life.

The coming Holidays are a busy and stressful time for most people. Starting right after Halloween the rush starts for Thanksgiving and Christmas. People pull out totes and boxes of Thanksgiving decorations. Individuals run to the store to purchase colorful stuffed turkey's, fall baskets with fake leaves to put on their table, tablecloths that feature typical Thanksgiving designs. You walk into their houses and you can tell Thanksgiving is here. I can appreciate the decorations and the holiday festivities. But, I think something important got lost in the translation of it all. The meaning of Thanksgiving.

Originally, Thanksgiving was a day to give Thanks for a successful crop, typically corn. It was a day for the Plymouth Colonists to give Thanks to the Native American's for all they were taught. It was a day to give Thanks for making it another year, it was a day to share what The Lord blessed the colonists with.  It was a day to give Thanks. It would be my guess that is why it is called Thanksgiving.

In our life, Thanksgiving and Christmas are not a mad rush. It is now the Sunday before Thanksgiving and our daily life has not changed. Tomorrow I am going to purchase the turkey and all the fixings to go with it. That will be the extent of our rush until November 24th when our annual Thanksgiving meal will be cooked. We are blessed to be able to spend it with our kids, a few friends and hopefully some of our family. Our decorations are made out of construction paper that our children made and we tape them on the wall. That is the extent of our decorations. If it sounds simple, that is because it is. The holidays weren't meant to put more stress into our lives, they are meant to remind of what we are thankful for.

This year I am Thankful for the the relationship I share with The Lord who has blessed me with my wonderful family, the health that we all have and the life I have been blessed with. I am Thankful to have a loving family, outside of my husband and children, who I can count on and give me joy. I am thankful to have a few good friends who help me through my trials and tribulations.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Our life changing trip

This is the last post to "catch up" on the beginning of my journey, after this, it's on to daily life of my kind of simplicity. There are different types of simplicity,, I only follow a few.

My husband and I never really went on a vacation. I guess we always thought we were to busy. I always had an excuse. I don't think it ever bothered my husband, he never asked to go anywhere.

After 13 years of marriage we finally went on our honeymoon. It was a life changing trip. We didn't go to Disneyland, we didn't go to any tourist attraction, we didn't even have a destination in mind. Our very best finds in life we just stumble on and this was no different. We decided when we left home once we got through Ohio, we would take back roads to wherever we were headed. We entered into Kentucky, left  I-75 and got on a county road and took it south. As we traveled through Kentucky it seemed like we entered a different world. People were friendly, they moved slower and talked slower than people in Detroit, it didn't seem as busy and we liked it. We traveled almost all the way through Kentucky and spotted an elderly couple sitting on a bench outside of a party store. They seemed so content sitting there, they didn't seem to have a care in the world. They looked happy. We stopped to ask them how far it was to the next town. We were hungry for dinner and it was getting late. When my husband asked them "how far to the next town?". It seemed like it took forever to answer , 3 minutes to be exact. Yes, i looked at my watch - remember, mentally I was already planning the next step. His answer was about "30 minutes". He must have misunderstood, we wanted to know how many miles,, my husband asked him again. He took off his hat, scratched his head and looked at his wife. "bout,,,, 30 miles" he said. I was thinking, how can someone take so long to answer a simple question?? As it turned out, I had plenty of time to ponder that question, considering his time was off to the tune of two hours!

We ended up settling in a town called Whitley City, Kentucky. As we were passing a hotel my husband turned into the parking lot and that was our "home" for the next five days. We only did a few tourist things, we took a train trip through an old coal mine in Sterns, Kentucky and we went to the local diner a few times. I enjoy reading history and learning about how other cultures live. I think this was the best part of the trip, since we didn't have alot of sight seeing to do, we got to meet the locales. We talked with them and learned how they lived. Where we live, people talk about things they have, material things they would like to have and any gossip they can get there hands on. The people in Whitley City we met talked about their families, family activities and God. It was quite different than what we were used to. I fell in love with that city and the people. It was during those five days I found out what I was looking for in life. I was looking for a life that was slower, more simple and not so chaotic. I wanted to live there.

Moving down there was just not realistic. However, living the basic principles were realistic. We came home and life changed immediately. I stopped planning my daily activities. I took an inventory of what my life consisted of and started deleting certain things. I made a vow that spending time with my family would be the highest priority. I would never again be "to busy" for my children. Once I simplified my friends, it left plenty of time for certain things. I did things I hadn't done in years that I enjoyed. I started baking again, I learned to make bread and cinnamon rolls. I sat down and had long talks with my husband.

Since our trip, there have been times in my life where it could have gotten busy, it was up to me to not let that happen. Don't get me wrong, sometimes there aren't enough hours in a day, I just have to remember, there is always tomorrow.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

peach jam,, is how much??

One day, out of the blue, I was in the mood for peach jam. I went to the store to buy some. I didn't even think about the price. I get to the store, look at the price and couldn't believe it was over $3.00 for one little jar. I almost fell over. I passed it up. I just couldn't see paying that kind of money that wouldn't last me long, maybe a week.

So, i make a call to my mom. I knew she made strawberry jam growing up, how hard could it be? It ends up she never made peach jam, but her mom did. I remember it, it was really good!

By the end of the day my husband had bought me a water bath canner, I bought a few pounds of peaches at the fruit market, sugar and pectin. The next day I had 7 1/2 ounce jars of peach jam, all for under $4.00!

This was an important milestone into simplicity, more than i ever realized. It took one less thing off my shopping list - which was long enough- it saved the extra gas money having to run to the store since we always seemed to be running out of jam or jelly. Mentally it was comforting to know it was in the house. That summer I ended up making jam to last throughout the winter. With the money I saved from not having to buy jam I stocked up on extra peanut butter and put a few extra dollars in my pocket. The next summer I canned not only jam, but canned peaches for the kids to last the winter. That winter the kids ate canned peaches and homemade snacks all winter.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

It's a start!

There were three things that started my new journey into simplicity. Briefly, I will describe these three things and then fast forward to life my life now. It's important to remember that it's baby steps that get you there, wherever "there" might be.

A clothesline - my life as a child seemed so much more simple. My mom made most of my clothes, she canned in the summer, she even made our Halloween costumes. My parents had everything they needed, but for the most part, they were simple people. My mom still is. I thought back to when my mom looked content. Instantly, I had a vision of her hanging clothes up on her clothesline. She always looked relaxed and she was never in a hurry. I ended up stopping by Sears one day after work, they had a clothesline on their web site that I really liked. A young man, probably about 20 came up to help me. I asked what section the clotheslines were in. He had no idea what I was talking about, I think I aged 20 years in just that moment. I explained to him what I was talking about. "You know, a clothesline, people typically have them in their backyard, you hang clothes on them to dry". He looked at me strangely. I don't know if it was a look like he still had no idea what I was talking about, or if he wondered why in the world someone would want to do that. I said "Your mom probably had one in her backyard" Facial expression was the same. So I tried " your grandma probably had one". Bingo! A realization dawned on his face. Ok, 20 more years was added to my life! As it turned out, they didn't carry them in the store, I still had to order it online. A week later my clothesline had come in the mail, my husband put it up and all i had to do now was use it! How exciting,,,, now, if I could just find the time to actually use it!

Friday, October 28, 2011

Wait! Slow down!

Life was going fast, to fast! Our journey into simplicity wasn't planned, it didn't have a name, I suppose it did, we just didn't know the name, we didn't know the philosophy existed.  The one thing my husband and I did know was the days, weeks, months and years were flying by us. We were working to get somewhere and we were working hard to get there. One night we sat and asked each other, what were we working hard for? Our answer was: a happy family and a rewarding life.

Were we there yet? No.
Did we have a plan to get there? Of course we did we were working to get there.
How long was this going to take? We had no idea.

All of a sudden, it didn't seem like we had a great plan. Our children were growing up and I felt like I was missing the most important and enjoyable time of their childhood. Thankfully, I had a job where I could schedule my work to fit the kids schedule. If they had an event at school I could be there. If I wanted to volunteer to help out with fundraising for the school I could schedule that. The issue was, I was rushing from one activity to another. I never stopped and just enjoyed what I was doing at the moment, I never stopped long enough to just "smell the flowers". Although I was able to physically be at the activities, my mind was always thinking of the next thing I had to do, my children deserved all of my time, not just part of it. My husband deserved a wife that could fully invest in him. My family deserved more and so did I.

So, unknowingly, the journey to Simplicity was born and it is a journey I will never regret making. So, I welcome you to read my story and welcome to Simple Living.